I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
is it customary for a bride to wear white even if she's a whore? i feel tie-dye would have been more accurate
i can't tell if you're serious or not, but 420 is gonna be pirate themed
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
I found you laying in the kitchen with a bottle of vodka and a slice of bologna on your face. You said you were having a spa day.
He said I was the "egg mcmuffin" of blowjobs. I'm flattered.
I projectile vomited in his sisters room where the toiled would have been if it were the bathroom.
So I've decided to grow a vagina forest. Because I'm single and it's like a zen garden. Brings a new meaning to long hair don't care.
Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any
She's going to hate me
Yeah well one of her many personalities always hates you.
The rest will just start to agree
I may or may not have pissed on my floor last night
Welcome to 22
making my breakfast out of the pot brownies we made last night. Safe to say it's time to go grocery shopping.
Happy birthday and sorry I punched your friend in the face
Have you ever been so drunk you pass out in the cab and everyone goes inside and forgets about you? I have
I hummed the theme from jaws while she was taking the pregnancy test....needless to say she was not pleased
Randomize
