Every time we go downtown I ask myself why we live in Des Moines
I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
I don't know where your sunglasses are, I was too preoccupied with girls not old enough to drive past midnight.
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
By midnight I was dipping doritos in frosting...that's how my simmer break diet is going.
I'm challenging a 70 yr old alcoholic woman who is half my size tonight. Wish me luck
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
This juggling 3 dicks is getting exhausting
He held the beaver pelt from the fireplace over my crotch and asked his friend "she look familiar now?", he then remembered my name.
Did I get stoned on a sunday afternoon and speak to someone on the phone for an hour about cats and their behaviour? Glad you asked. And yes.
I was jumping over your garbage can screaming "Im a snow cat!!" ..Who wouldn't want to see that?
I feel very compelled to cut off the person's ears that is sitting in front of me
Our first order of business as new roommates was to test the sex acoustics of our rooms. I need a new box spring.
I just remember yelling "BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS" while I was streaking
He's ready to settle down, whereas I'm like "More shots please"
Randomize
