Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
george bush was a better president for first pitches than barack obama. there. i said it.
you made your own hammock out of a towel and duct tape.
You said that you were drinking out of a pan, and then went on to apologise to 'Jesus and all the other guys' for drinking on a Sunday.
Lol. Awesome. Seriously though, I need you focused next year. We're gone have a lot of drinking and stupid nonsense to do, and I don't want dumb shit like responsibility to get in my fucking way.
I got to see some gay bartender let a girl with daddy issues whip Travis in the balls with his own belt. Totally worth it.
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
Well I was kicked out of the bar and woke up on a picnic table. I'd say the night was awesome!
It was just a Craigslist hook up but she wore sweats. Where are the girls with class?
You can fuck right off with that, "If the earthquake isnt bigger than 5.0, we native Californians dont get out of bed." I am from Chicago. I can handle freak flash floods, polar vortexes and tornados. But my bed violently shaking at 6:30 in the morning is cause for some understandable concern.
It's days like today, when my bra and underwear match, that make me feel like I'm getting my life together...
Can't beat it when the local bar sends you off with a loaf of bread on the way out the door.
You said too many real things and now I need to crawl back inside my protective fort of sarcasm, being an asshole, and sass
I just want to be like "i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it"
Randomize
