I can't try on my wedding dress because someone is trying to commit suicide in the store. Is this a sign?
Pre-game strategy: play thunder by yourself in the shower. Surprisingly, success.
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
In a min. With a stripper at the hospital. Business. Not pleasure.
Oh my god, I am the best RA ever. I'm teaching my freshman girls how to deep throat on bananas as a group bonding activity. I'm making the religious ones eat them for potassium.
Nypd just made jon and hayes chug their forties.
We smoked speed and opium for the first time. ended up harvesting cucumbers with locals at 9am in a farmers field. Laos is fuckin crazy.
It is very possible that having sex with you just now just got me into Yale
Did you hear about Miss Teen Delaware? From the snippet they played on the radio, I knew exactly what porn company it was from. Maybe I should cut back
i don't knpow whats goin on i think theyre sacrificeing me to th tequila gods
Btw any and all sexual fantasies or arousal I had about cops is null and void.
That would be a mascot riding an ATV at a semi-professional hockey game, if that doesn't sum up how I've been I don't know what could
I mean, he drove your car and it burst into flames, if anyone cant be trusted, it's him.
Masturbating with Lord of the Rings on was not how I planned my afternoon going but here I am.
Randomize
