I just woke up in the coolest sweatsuit i have ever seen..it has cory's name on the tag...do we know a cory?
They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
the meat mosque collapsed into the alcohol moat
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
I know I should be focused on nurturing their bright little minds but it's 10 a.m. and I need a cock in my mouth
Started with us just having a beer. Now Ivan lit a torch to walk to the store, Ben smashed a 26 in the parking lot, and they're throwing broken shot glasses. Fratio Friday is something.
the only good thing about breaking up with him while naked was that i got to make a forgetting sarah marshall reference
Promise me, at my funeral, you will re-enact our human sledding incident of 2011....you can use my dead body as said sled.
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
I wore home his HoHoHo boxers. I've never felt such a connection to an article of clothing.
I just hope I don't wheeze during sex
I was laying out of the open window, talking with him on the phone, while we were both puking at the same time.. Guys at the party called it "true love"..
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
Excuse you? I'm an asshole at least 90% of the time. Get it right.
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