i just saw an asian skipping down the street and it made me think of you
She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
just upper decked a verizon store cause they don't cover against "getting phone crushed by a keg." had to pay 175 for a new one
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
Just had a horrible realization. I've fucked a guy with a webbed foot AND a guy with a third nipple.
so far I've only met her once and hung out one other time. Up to 5 BJs already. That's serious efficiency.
i have officially banned the recreational use of bayonets.
I don't know, I kept pretending that I was riding an elephant during. It was actually really fun, but you can't tell him that!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got my dick out in a gay bar for just one free shot. I didn't know I could be bought so cheap
he would snap chat his dick as like Harry Potter
Yes dating, but it seems easier to just live in a perpetual state of Netflix, internet porn, and cheese.
Oh, don't mind me, that's just my vagina rattling.
None of these texts make sense. except for "step 2.5 equals velociraptor." that i get.
you ate an entire watermelon by using a CD as a spoon, then proceeded to chuck the leftovers at some dudes car...
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