My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
Giving me the bigger bowl of ramen isn't considered "romantic"
I hope this adventure ends at a hospital
Well I'm 85-90% sure that he licked syrup off my body, but no guarantees...
I need a gatorade, my back cracked, my crimper, my shot glass, a sock of rice and an explanation.
You did this to yourself.
I think he offered to cook me dinner or cook me for dinner. Not really sure. Just smiled and nodded.
all law school has taught me so far is how to fart quietly during lectures and how to out-argue the ice cream guy when he screws me out of extra toppings.
Idk who invented dominoes cheese steak pizza but I wanna lick their balls
I’ve lost count of how many disciplines of science this conversation about Harry Potter has gone through.
did anyone ever come to your door asking about the blood on the floor?
have you ever tried to puke in an automatic flushing toilet? impossible
Bold words for someone NOT on a unicycle
we live vicariously through your huge boobs
That bitch claimed that you said it was ok if she drank your vodka. Obviously she has never met you
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