I'm either going to be a Playboy Playmate or take over the world. Either way the world wins.
if all i could do was poop and smoke weed, i'd be eternally happy
amen to that sister
just saw a dude in a v-neck sweater on a bike drinking starbucks. way to feed the stereotypes white dude.
Just took career test that listed librarian and bartender as top career choices. Fascinating.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
another holiday season passes without receiving a dick in a box, where did i go wrong in life?
is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
Doing shrooms is fine until you get raped by curtains
Look at the picture I MADE him take with me...like why??? He's holding my foot?
He won a jackpot and invited his ex girlfriend over to have sex on 5grand
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
My orifices are off limits as long as you have that stache. Your call.
I know its 2 in the morning and everything. But i just straight up yelled "DON'T YOU UNDERSTAND THIS WORLD IS DIFFICULT ENOUGH AS IT IS WITHOUT YOU PULLING THIS BULLSHIT ON ME" to my taco. Because it fell apart on me. I think i might be cracking under this finals pressure.
DESTROY DICK DECEMBER\nTHE SUN SHINES ON THE THIRSTY
Do you think the hole in the ceiling will count against our security deposit?
i just found a pair of your underwear stuffed behind my harry potter books...was that on purpose?
haha no, it was majik
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