Omg. If Ina Garten Makes roast chicken one more time im going to strangle her with her white button down
I am in the hospital with a broken wrist because a guy told me that if I punched him it "wouldn't hurt." it hurt. me. Thank you 11 jello shots.
this is going to sound stupid but when I was drunk and thought I was a stripper where I did toss my pants?
He just became a fan of Chelsea Handler on Facebook. WHY DO I ALWAYS PICK THE GAY ONE
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I either just got cockblocked or saved from a lengthy court case so I'm kinda conflicted about how my night went.
Dude, smoked out of a pumpkin tonight. I like Halloween more now
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
I rarely go in there. Unless it's for mini cadbury eggs and whiskey.
I think my cats understand what porn is. And it's all my fault.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Responsible roommate: 1. Someone who takes a huge shit at work so as not to clog the toilet at home.
I feel like he better crank it up to level RG IV tomorrow. It's the fucking playoffs.
You've fucked so many I should get a word bank when you make me guess these things.
I want to preface this by saying nothing happened, nothing is on fire. It is mere speculation. Do we have a fire extinguisher?
Asking for a friend: is it frowned upon to eat pizza while you materbate or does it just mean you are fantastic at multitasking?
I kid you not. He let me in into his house, showed me the putt putt in his backyard. Offered to play me.
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