Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
im watching my roommate bang this girl. she doesn't look like she's any good, because he has a bored look on his face...
my mom just walked in on me furiously masturbating while reading twilight. needless to say, im officially out of the closet.
i feel like im doing the pre-walk of shame..like every car that drives by is like, ooooo look at that girl, in that itty bitty dress, yep shes about to get her skank on tonight...
Omg I'm so stupid. All the peoples fb status that said "spain" I thought they were all going to spain.......
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
I'm literally partying with O.J. Simpson's son right now. I don't know what to make of this.
I have had more skin than food in my mouth the last three days
Two questions for you. Did I throw up last night and did we get food or did I dream that..?
No you never threw up but you did force me to take you to wendy's because you wanted "beef and ketchup"
She took the fish and put it in the hot tub, then turned on the jets. She said she was training it for the Olympics.
I was going to say I needed the exercise but now all I can think about is BJs
My work here is done
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
I yield to the immortal wisdom of one ludacris, who famously wrote, "can't turn a hoe in to a housewife." Indeed, ludacris, indeed.
I have weed and a speedo - I don't need anything else.
ugh, my whole family is going ape shit over my sister's pregnancy blog. I dont get it? Anyone can get knocked up! I had rebound sex with a new york ranger last night, now that is something to fucking blog about.
Randomize
