whoever says they hate hangovers just doesnt know how to embrace them. i'm eating a mashed potato sandwich and watching grind.
So I went outside my house this morning and basically my entire front lawn is covered in gummi bears... I think that involves you guys.
I am so hungover and cant move but craving a Wendys frosty so bad. I might have to watch 2 girls 1 cup just to settle the urge
They woke me up at 6am and made me drink a bottle pf champagne yelling "champagne breakfast!"
Judging by what she did last night, I would say at least 4 of them have mono now.
If I remember who won the superbowl tomorrow morning.. I think I'm just going to quit drinking. There really won't be a point anymore
I'm sitting at my desk looking through our payroll system photos to find my next boyfriend. Abuse of power or awesome?
Cause its not a drunken adventure unless someone ends up in a pool
Can you please come and collect your boss off of my kitchen floor.
I'm not entirely sure how getting 'house drunk' turned into us getting trashed, being serenaded by karaoke and going out. But it needs to happen again.
Every now and then I'll meet one who is talented in the art of shower gymnast.
We found you wrapped up in a tarp in the garage the next morning, thats how real shit got.
I like to feed my guinea pigs before I get stoned. In case they get contact high and get the munchies. It's only polite.
Babe if there was a way to give a back rub and head at the same time that's what I would ask for my birthday, Christmas and of course right now. Please think about how and get back to me.
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
Randomize
