this guy jus got head in a gas station bathroom from this fat chick with one leg
gross dude. was the guy blacked out drunk or something?
yeah and it only cost me 6 dollars
I need to stop taking drags of other peoples cigarettes, it's such a tease. Like playing just the tip, you just can't
I kinda wish he had even a slight idea of the sex I'm planning for his departure. I'm literally studying for it.
I should show up to the gym drunk more often. I felt like i really motivated all the fat people.
Do something fun then. Blow up the house or whatever.
How have you survived this long?
Dumb luck and a deal with the devil.
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
I tried...failed..now im naked on the futon since clothes are hard.
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
Fuck I am so excited for the first time I can make someone call me Doctor Nikki during sex after I finish my PhD
He peed off the roof and then we bonded it was beautiful
I ran into him drunk, barefoot, at rite aid and he said I looked "stunning." Yeah, Stunningly shitfaced haha
I feel like at this point in my life I should be dating someone who doesn't run out of all his money on Mondays and have to wait til fridy to buy his weed
She just left someone a voicemail saying 'you better not have plans Saturday night, cause I'm going to sit on your face.'
stupid neighbors doing stupid yard work with their stupid kids when i want to do drugs in the backyard
I fucked a 6 foot tall guy who has abs showing without even flexing... I am a wizard and I have magical powers.
Randomize