its like his balls were made of silver and he was trying to polish the tarnish off
You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
Jesus can read your poker face... He is not pleased
Is it gay to rub my penis between my butt cheeks and pretend that they're tits?
Wow! You need to get laid.
apparently 9 shots of absynthe does not take away your skill to walk. i just woke up under a tree in some field on the other side of town with 4 hours missing.
i found a beer bottle on top of the urinal, peed in it and put it back... if anyone gets drunk enough to fall for it they deserve it
im just sayin im driving an hr to pick her up, just cause shes your gf doesnt mean i shouldnt be entitled to a bj
I know. You don't know poor life choice until your sitting on the floor of a community bathroom waiting to vomit at 4 am
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
Had to go to the urgent for a physical and I gave them my fake. Nurse was a sport though
I'm currently braless eating the balls of the penis cake and drinking warm champagne. I'm 3 cats away from crazy at this point
can't believe I traded a good night's sleep and a midterm for your blurry tits
All he gave me was a sore vagina and film suggestions
OKAY THAT'S CREEPY AND I'D PROBABLY ACCIDENTLY ORGASM
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
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