If I see one more commercial for The Secret Life of the American Teenager, I'm going to punch the next teenage girl I see in the uterus and scream, "Wear a condom!"
I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
Yo dude either Brian has herpes or he was jerking off to Web MD 'cause I just walked in on him
he had a sign stolen from the tennis court hanging above his bed that said, "please limit play to one hour while others are waiting"
Well, at first I was really confused. But then I realized that he was talking from his penis's perspective... in third person.
We are probably going to have to use your boobs as currency to get this done
Don't you dare blame me for walking in one walking in on ur fuck session....u decided to fuck where we hid our booze
why is there a broken handcuff locked to the ceiling fan
I don't want to ruin date night, but you have no idea how hard it is to poop whilst looking at cute puppies.
I have to take tonight off from shenanigans. My liver is planning a coup
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
It's funny because every time I go up and down the stairs it's an adventure. A A DRUNK ADVENTURE. PS I ALREADY THREW UP WTF
I just woke up naked next to a GetGo sandwich and I can hear my cats are eating my combos. So that's my life.
If you fall asleep, my vagina and I will never forgive you.
He said you asked to eat pepperoni off his dick and he thought it was weird
I mean I thought it sounded fun
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