Just got a orange juice for my grandma, put gin in it without thinking. She's having a good morning.
Thursdays are my worst days
but now we sippin champagne when we thirstay?
Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
i forgot beer had calories. that would explain alot.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yea, remember to blow out the fire from flaming shots. Unless you want burnt lips. Just saying, I'm an example of ignorance and intoxication.
I did nothing besides stay sober all night, I walked home to find max naked knocking cups off the counter with his cock lol
Just re-gained consciousness in the freshman girls dorm. Normally this would be awesome but I'm on the floor surrounded by chicks doing their homework. This makes me uncomfortable but I don't think they know I'm awake yet. If I b-line for the door can you come get me?
despite the cops showing up at 8am, pre gaming groundhog day was my idea yet. and by pre gaming, i of course mean getting black out drunk by 7:30am
I told you I'm not going to the Phillies game until we're tripping balls
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What's the right thing to say when he sends me a picture of his penis ?
I had to rip your toilet paper for you...
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
I feel like an involuntary Mother Theresa. I DON'T WANT TO BE ABSTINENT!
There are far too many naked dudes in your apartment, and they aren't even watching porn. I mean seriously, they've got the Lion King on.
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
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