Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
There is a clear recurring theme of me having sex in restrooms that really needs to stops
Oh so it was one of those "I shouldn't have gotten in a cab with a random 21 year old girl" kinda nights.
we got plastered, then made lists of anything thats ever been in our vaginas
I know. Brad is upset because he was lower on the list than "that carrot stick"
Dude, jerking off when you're all hopped up on pre workout energy supplements has got to be the greatest thing I've ever done.
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
Apparently getting a blow job in the mens room from the bar owners daughter will get you kicked out.
I have discovered my latent superpower. If a friend is dating a bi chick they will inevitably try and talk me into a threesome.
Sometimes i like to think we arent living together next year and that im living with models that like to experiment but you ruin that fantasy time and time again
Ok: all ex-gfs except you from the last 5 years have or are about to have a baby...be on the lookout...
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
Wish me luck. My vagina needs it.
May his noodley appendage touch you.
He wrote on the bartenders notepad "phone?" So I wrote back "911"
Is it okay to get drunk at a baby shower? ....asking for a friend
why did i wake up in the bathroom?
we had to stay with you a while until we convinced you it wasn't safe to wash your face, then you fell asleep with your foot in the toilet.
Randomize
