Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
she gave him a mild concussion from throwing him against the wall in an attempt to dance with him. gotta love monday nights at the sandbar.
And I was the only one who felt it was dangerous to set the tv and blender on the ledge of the hot tub
If he thought that flying across an ocean to visit me in London constituted sex, he thought wrong.
when she first told me she hooked up with him my initial response was to shout "WE HAVE SOMETHING IN COMMON!"
Are you absolutely against sleeping in your car? Because i've done that before.
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
It's nights like those I refer to my life motto: You can't be just friends with someone after you've seen their genitals.
$200 on plane. $110 on train. $5 per drink on plane. $15 per case on train. Plane 1 hour flight. Train 9 hour excursion. Hmmmmm.
we somehow managed to fit a llama, a stripper pole and a hayride all into the same day.
I'm happily sitting on the toilet cause I'm too tired to move. I'm considering making this my permanent residence. It has a lot to offer.
I was just thinking about our drunk conversation about having sex with elephants the other night. Love you bud. Stay strong.
I won't let penises inside me if you won't let tequila inside you, deal?
Leave it to me to pull up my boyfriend’s grandfather’s obituary just to find out the name of his sister.
Man, coughing on your period is like the biggest gamble a girl can make.
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