so now she's a stripper
can't say i'm surprised
he was lying next to me and i saw him text "score" to someone.
I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
im sorry, I just can't fuck a guy who can't receive picture messages
You SHOULD feel empty, we were at the top of our game, and by that i mean snorting things we don't understand and only a few steps away from adultery.
Just picture a dyson vacuum with razor blades. That's how it felt.
This tent reeks of fear and sangria
and lets be real... who can blow a middle school class's sunday school teacher and keep a straight face ever again? NOBODY.
I have a cut on my head from a tambourine.
Did i tell you my idea for my life plan? Not the one that involves stripping.
Thanks be to the Goddess of Whores!! I straightened my bed before Ken got here. Found Calvin's boxers in the sheets!!!!
Lost my virginity dressed as catwoman. He was dressed as batman. Glad I waited.
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
I left my parents and ran through the airport. I was like I'm not getting stuck in Atlanta tonight and not having sex.
Somewhere on my work laptop I have a map visualizing all the area codes that Ludacris has ho's
I hope that wasn't done on billed time
I can guarantee that it was
Randomize
