I don't smoke a lot but now and then I do. Weed and I are like still standing naked in a bathroom together deciding if we should blow one another or bolt for the exit. An awkward relationship.
Is it too weird if im a sexy tampon for halloween?
Maybe he just has a boisterous penis
Come scavenge bits of tuna out of my chest hair
Does this sound normal?...She's ironing on pictures of her dead cat to all of her green clothes...
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
We tried to make a sex tape, but we were hammered and she forgot to take the cap off the camera. Somebody starts snoring 10 minutes in.
when i tried to put the condom on he started screaming about how he didn't want his groceries bagged
I apologize for excluding you. On a better note: the stripper that made out with my wife friend requested me on facebook
Is this like a "I'm taking you out to dinner and treating you with respect" kind of date, or is this a "I'm gonna fill you with alcohol and cheese and stuff my dick in your anus" kind of date?
I woke up to my one night stand and he said, "now that's the one to beat"
Now when you said you'd never sleep with me, did you really mean never on a Monday or never without handcuffs or a blindfold or never on a airplane or never without lots of booze? Cus never is a pretty strong word.
i feel like you should know pants are always optional
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
Can we skype so I'm not drinking alone?
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