Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
I thought at least he would want to exchange numbers after he tried to put it in my bum
She just said she wanted to get freaky and left the room. I'm almost certain I just heard the microwave.
He is the Donovan McNabb of stuff up his ass. Tell me that tomorrow. Too high to remember.
We should live in a duplex and just hook up with randoms for the rest of forever and be animal hoarders.
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
You were saying you didn't want to go home and insisted that I drop you guys off at your uncles. That's how you ended up sleeping on a porch with two dudes
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
All I have done at work today is eat and try to get my coworker to tie me to his bed again
He is indeed a crazy mutha fucka. But mark my words. MARK MY WORDS. My job has placed me at the same party as Tom Cruise. I. Am. Fucking. The. Crazy. Out. Of . That. Alien . Fucker.
Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again.
I think I caught your cold through my vagina. It was worth it.
I had a really bad dream about us drinking this weekend. Remind me to tell you Friday when we start drinking
We shared a dick. We're practically sisters!
Just had a threesome with my best friend and LSAT teacher...just checked three things off my bucket list in one night
Randomize
