My room should be renamed "Land of the Misfit Condoms."
Watching tv. She's giving me head and she hates it when I watch her.
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
His concept of male bonding is doing lines in adjacent stalls.
I think "I actually like giving blow jobs better" qualifies her as a keeper
I don't want to talk. I just want to motorboat those tits
I think they called the cops after 15 minutes of you shaking their clothes line like the ultimate warrior and calling out hulk hogan
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
He gave me such a powerful orgasm I blurted out I love you. This is why just rebouding out of a serouis relationship is awkward.
there is no excuse for drinking mascato in your room alone while listening to one-hit wonders from the 90s
Not only have I fallen off the wagon, it ran me over and just kept going...
Watching him and my sister argue over a rum and coke about who's going to chop the coffee table in half with a hatchet...
Just remembered when I first started going down on him he goes "ok now I feel a little better about the broncos losing"
I came on her face and asked if she wanted fries with that. Currently driving to McDonald's.
I feel like a weird modern Betty Crocker. I'm icing a cake and looking at gay porn, if that's not an accurate portrayal of the 21st century idk what is.
Randomize
