this dieting is killing me...just started drooling watching a dog food commercial
totally just realized while washing my face that Cetaphil looks like semen.
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
omg. if hes just gonna get mad everytime i have sex with one of his "friends" then it was never gonna work out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At what point were we discussing suction-cupping a dildo to the wall?
Your tequila is gone. I suggest you bring more home before you go out for dinner. Money is taped to mailbox.
getting up at 8am to start drinking seemed like a much better idea before I had to wake up at 8am
I'm spending tomorrow with her. What should my ridiculous personal goal be? I've already got a blowjob while eating a cupcake
We need a full length mirror. I just ate it trying to look at my shoes on the toilet. But aside from a arm bruise I'm good to go
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know I ate twenty hot dogs in an hour once.
I am honestly so surprised you are a lesbian.
Henceforth: booty calls will now be referred to as "deliveries of anatomy". That is all.
but real talk, he made 1 phone call last night and had someone bring us tacos at 3am so idk I might be inlove
I'm the only person I know who could have actual sex and then dream about my vibrator.
You should not be involved with someone who smells like that. Because that smell seriously does not go away. Even if you can't actually smell it at any given point, it will still haunt you
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
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