Tell me I did not drive one hour for whiskey dick.
you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
the cops didn't wanna shut the tailgate down but the strippers weren't allowed to take money without a license or somthing
Nothing says walk of shame better than a onesie and a 12 pack of corona..
I need a picture of your dick for my friends birthday card
I won't drink with you again until you promise to not feed me anymore paper bags
I made a side by side comparison of her Facebook pic and the chick on the anti meth billboards. Plus a ven diagram showing mostly shared physical attributes. I sent u the PowerPoint. You were sufficiently warned.
as he was bent over the toilet, he turned to me and said "barbarian kyle is much stronger than regular kyle" and then went right back to puking.
Say whatever you bloody well like; you don't know the true meaning of life until you have smoked to a Sade cd.
I tried to open a bottle of wine with toenail clippers last night. So this morning was obviously rough.
Well I can cross 'get my dick slathered in coconut oil while watching the bob's burgers porn parody' off my bucket list.
Should I wear my "kiss me I'm highrish" shirt for my drug screen today?
Your youporn search history says otherwise.
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
I'm at the drive thru window, five minutes out. If the bathtub is empty or you're dressed when I arrive I'm not sharing.
Randomize
