I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
saw him outside... he got fatter, i got blonder. the winner is obvious.
how hairy? two words: wookie tits
then for some reason i googled "how much to buy a cannon"
These 19 Men’s Fashion Mistakes are Unforgivable, According to Women
discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
I was so hungover that I had to stop in the middle of the game and throw up. The fans cheered.
making your facebook status TEQUILA is like basically saying "im easy tonight. feel free to take advantage"
Was just explained ingredients in a four loko. Puzzles of the universe starting to piece together.
why is there a broken handcuff locked to the ceiling fan
25 Cringeworthy Below the Pants Injuries
I have to take a quiz before midnight. Trying to decided if its a better idea to take it now when I'm stoned or later when I'm drunk.
One of your snapchats was of you with a 40oz of Mickeys and the caption: "Deep Throat back in her natural habitat"
In other news, I just sent her a video of me masturbating while driving in the rain, so I guess you could say I've mastered Snapchat
You should really look at your snapstory. It has us screaming " MANSION DICK! SUCK IT! FUCK IT!" By the way im currently in a mansion and need you to pick me up
Pussy, Peanut Butter Cookies,and Bubble Wrap
High me is so sweet. She left not-high me a fortune from a fortune cookie and 6 packets of soy sauce in my tampon drawer.