Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

Favorite
(415): View more from California

Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(415): Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust? http://tfl.nu/brsq

Replies (30) Good night (1280) Bad night (2475) Order T-Shirt
Favorite
(847): View more from Illinois

no one should ever give us hovercrafts

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(847): no one should ever give us hovercrafts http://tfl.nu/uqn3

Replies (25) Good night (4381) Bad night (624) Order T-Shirt
Favorite
(269): View more from Michigan

I don't know where I am but there are firefighters

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(269): I don't know where I am but there are firefighters http://tfl.nu/dbyd

Replies (18) Good night (6241) Bad night (931) Order T-Shirt
Favorite
(860): View more from Connecticut

i was just skypeing her and i saw the vagisil medicated wipes in the corner of her room. i'll be breaking this off tomorrow

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(860): i was just skypeing her and i saw the vagisil medicated wipes in the corner of her room. i'll be breaking this off tomorrow http://tfl.nu/61vx

Replies (66) Good night (589) Bad night (5987) Order T-Shirt
Favorite
(651): View more from Minnesota

She touched you, you're now contaminated for 48 hours. Please watch out for rashes, hives and STDs as she's known to have all three.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(651): She touched you, you're now contaminated for 48 hours. Please watch out for rashes, hives and STDs as she's known to have all three. http://tfl.nu/b36h

Replies (17) Good night (664) Bad night (5031) Order T-Shirt
Favorite
(206): View more from Washington

My cleaning lady broke my bubbler. It's awkward between us now.

(415): View more from California

Why?

(206): View more from Washington

Because she knows I do drugs and I know she's a clumsy bitch.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(206): My cleaning lady broke my bubbler. It's awkward between us now. (415): Why? (206): Because she knows I do drugs and I know she's a clumsy bitch. http://tfl.nu/7w51

Replies (15) Good night (1588) Bad night (4161)
Favorite
(954): View more from Florida

I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(954): I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother. http://tfl.nu/rbuh

Replies (9) Good night (2528) Bad night (1389) Order T-Shirt
Favorite
(832): View more from Houston, Texas

Look on the bright side. Now you know the number for poison control.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(832): Look on the bright side. Now you know the number for poison control. http://tfl.nu/bxmz

Replies (2) Good night (1597) Bad night (1131) Order T-Shirt
Favorite
(204): View more from Manitoba

Ugh he's texting me.

(1-204): View more from Manitoba

Tell him you're no longer interested in what he has to offer; his shitty personality outweighs his sexual prowess.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(204): Ugh he's texting me. (1-204): Tell him you're no longer interested in what he has to offer; his shitty personality outweighs his sexual prowess. http://tfl.nu/6r54

Replies (5) Good night (1449) Bad night (480) Order T-Shirt
Favorite
(410): View more from Maryland

Explain it like you would if you were talking to a 5 yo

(410): View more from Maryland

Wait no, like you would to a stoned high school freshman.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(410): Explain it like you would if you were talking to a 5 yo (410): Wait no, like you would to a stoned high school freshman. http://tfl.nu/b3bx

Replies (2) Good night (1332) Bad night (847)
Favorite
(561): View more from Florida

Just had a shirt made that says "I'm sorry" going to wear it every sat and sun morning for the foreseeable future

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(561): Just had a shirt made that says "I'm sorry" going to wear it every sat and sun morning for the foreseeable future http://tfl.nu/peo6

Replies (4) Good night (925) Bad night (351) Order T-Shirt
Favorite
(402): View more from Nebraska

Fuck you for setting me up with the guy from the Nickelback cover band

(312): View more from Illinois

Payback for not stopping me from fucking the guy in the wookie costume

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(402): Fuck you for setting me up with the guy from the Nickelback cover band (312): Payback for not stopping me from fucking the guy in the wookie costume http://tfl.nu/sqqx

Replies (18) Good night (2653) Bad night (532)
Favorite
(+49): View more from Germany

I feel like a Europe failure cause I'm coming home from the club at 3:30 and so many people are just arriving... Wtf? 3:30am People! Drink earlier!

(303): View more from Colorado

It's a Tuesday.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(+49): I feel like a Europe failure cause I'm coming home from the club at 3:30 and so many people are just arriving... Wtf? 3:30am People! Drink earlier! (303): It's a Tuesday. http://tfl.nu/jt9q

Replies (4) Good night (1347) Bad night (373)
Favorite
(660): View more from Missouri

On duty sugar tits. A Marine never abandons his post to take nudi pics.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(660): On duty sugar tits. A Marine never abandons his post to take nudi pics. http://tfl.nu/mn1y

Replies (24) Good night (2529) Bad night (333) Order T-Shirt
Favorite
(780): View more from Alberta, CA

Dude, on the way home the cab driver asked why you didn't bring a guy home and referred to you as "one night stand girl"

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(780): Dude, on the way home the cab driver asked why you didn't bring a guy home and referred to you as "one night stand girl" http://tfl.nu/k17c

Replies (2) Good night (825) Bad night (300) Order T-Shirt

Randomize

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Find Us On: