is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
I either just heard my neighbors having sex or she really agreed with whatever he was talking about.
If it wasnt for my iphone and loopt, I would still be wandering the streets in a drunken stooper. Thanks Steve Jobs.
anal on a first date. tsk tsk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I decided that not getting a job after college is gods way of telling me I will make a great housewife
whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
I thought about farting is his face when he was going down on me last nite.
i jus dunped the rest of my drink down the sink and tool my bra off. pretty sure this is the best decision for everybody.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
ugh... thank God for ATM withdrawal limits. I was drunk enough to give that weird shaped stripper all of my money while making her cry in the back room.
Mike found the condom wrapper on the washing machine and looked at me and said "Magnum? NICE girl. Get that nut!" then proceeded to puke in a cup
The guy next to me in the library just got a call from his roommate asking him to come bail him out of jail...we need to step up our game.
Besides he said his dick was as big as a loaf of bread and that it was broken. So I was like u have half a head of hair and a broken dick that looks like bread. No thanks. Im good.
I should be rewarded with oreos for not turning into a raging cunt.
Sometimes the most spiritual fucking thing to do is punch somebody in the face.
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