It is virtually impossible to listen to single ladies and perform any seated task.
I guess I should mention that I have already fucked the Fed Ex guy.
That changes everything.
"reccomended dose" hasn't been in my vocabulary for quite some time.
he has a knack for choosing the worst time to masturbate
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
have the fact that the early bird is danced upon by the prettiest strippers be your motivation
The slot machines are wishing me happy birthday. Mission success.
Some might say its sad that I am willingly picking up a coke habit to be the skinniest bridesmaid... I think it shows my great dedication and proves I should have been maid of honor.
You slammed your forties down on the table and yelled "I AM EDWARD FORTYHANDS" then mumbled something about repping Idaho like a champ and laid down on the couch.
Well I'm over here squandering a fabulous hair day and radiant complexion
I'm not getting off this floor. I love this floor
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
Quick I need a sexy way to say "suck your balls"
It smells like grilled cheese and sexual frustration
I s2g I’m about to get ghosted by a 34 yr old and my Oedipus complex cannot take it
Randomize
