How many times can you lose to your mom in beer pong before you can no longer show your face around campus?
I didn't know there was such thing as a bad orgasm. Until him.
sorry for throwing an entire water bottle of vodka at you. It was very wasteful
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
There's a really old guy here with a really young girl. I'm guessing he has to make choo choo train noises to get his dick in her mouth.
Bad news? she threw her drink in his face, left her phone at the club, and disappeared. I found her laying in bed with the bottle she stole from our VIP service. Good news is she's asleep and I have the bottle, come home
We kept trying to bring you to the hospital but you had a tantrum and kept saying you would never be Miss America
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
I get so many dick pics from him...He has an unhealthy obsession with his own penis...
Okay, since we're going to be living together and I'm obviously better than you at everything, I have one single simple rule that I want you to follow: DO. NOT. FUCK WITH ME.
I just watched will sing pure imagination from willy wonka and then blow a banana
I have to sleep with him. We're too much alike. It's like clash of the titans, except instead of clashing, he's putting it in me.
Who told you he won a fight? He slammed his face into the ground while trying to do 11 push-ups
I am a taco. I am also really high.
I've always seen you more as a chimichanga.
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
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