We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
It smells like Drakkar Noir and desperation out here.
That's why you should quit smoking.
I think the recipie for awesome sauce is butter and semen
for real. he might as well bring dogs if they're lower than a 7.
After my date left I rallied and took the Asian girl home. Flexibility my friend.
He told me he deactivated his facebook because his girlfriend caught him wackin it to my profile picture.
10 points to you
So I went tanning and I burned my boobs.
They're like sad pomegranates.
This is how baked we were last night. Our drinking game: We stare at each other; first one to laugh drinks.
Well, I watched a girl proposition a shit ton of people, try to take a cocktail waitresses job and then proceed to walk into a wall. Damn, I'm a little jealous.
Great. Now I have to produce, edit and leak a sex tape before Saturday. Fundraising is hard.
How would your parents feel if we installed a sex swing?
I was so high I didn't realize I'd put on someone else's bra. I thought my boobs had shrunk.
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
THANKS BE TO BLACK BABY JESUS IN HIS LITTLE GOLDEN DIAPER FOR BLESSING ME WITH NOT PREGNANT
I wanted to say, you're welcome for your orgasms, thanks for not returning the favor, Needledick
Randomize
