if you like me you must not know who I am
Just donated money to a kid for her softball team.
Obviously I'm trying to futher our next generation of lesbians. I may be hitting on her at the gay bar in ten years...
so I just used the H1N1 mask my mom gave me for college to hold in a bong hit longer... god I love orientation week
Ironically her ferret's toys look like her sex toys.....this is a whole new level of kinky for me
apparently i was cut off before i even walked in
wine pong. its mother daughter day and i think she's mad. I smell like jager
I told her the only thing I had going for me was my huge cock. She said she was willing to overlook my other shortcomings.
only i would grind with someone to harp music at a gay wedding
We got way too high so we're sitting in the parking lot of the movies trying to figure out what bar to go to
Just used the "Buddy" Poppy flower I got from a veteran to clean my one hitter. "I'm proud to be an American"
Might be using my graduation money to pay for an abortion.
Today, my weed came in a pokéball. I officially love my dealer.
He asked me if I've ever had my ass ate and there was no polite way to say yeah your brother's pretty in to that 😂 I went with "no"
He asked me to fly out to Seattle to participate in a week of marathon sex so I'm at the airport now. I'll call you when I get back.
She grabbed the other one and started playing tug-o-war against the blonde chick. I told you getting my nipples pierced was a good idea
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