I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
When i asked him what happened all he said was, the toucan... the toucan... over and over again.
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
he found cum stains on my sheets and all i could blurt out was "better on the sheets than in me"
I've also decided that the true test of whether or not you should marry a girl is if she will willingly blow you while you eat Oreos.
We hit a golf ball off Brady's ass. His dignity flew away into the night.
The best was when you were crying, and trying to get the bouncer to "understand you AS A HUMAN BEING"
You just referred to a pillow with a stolen bra strapped to it as "she". Let that sink in for a minute.
He told me he was married and then fingered me on the kitchen counter. It was awkward to explaining the broken toaster to my roommates this morning...
I smoked my last bong as the sun rose. It was magical.
Come camping we have xanax and steaks
IS NO AN EMOTION BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT I'M FEELING RIGHT NOW
He drives a PT Cruiser.... that should have been my first clue.
The bouncer said the club was at capacity we couldnt get in till ppl left all three of them pulled their tits out we got complimentary bottle service never under estimate women
I'm not going to tell you how to live your life, which includes naming your schlong
Randomize
