So would u like to explain why you ate all my pickels and took my 1800?
About that, i have your 1800 on my desk with intentions of returning it but theres nothing i can do about the pickels
you just love her because she lets you bang her with fruits and veggies!
its like the voldemort of pregnancies, we don't talk about it
Abreva sucks. I applied it as directed and now it looks like I fed the herpes. They're throwing a party on my bottom lip.
Any questions about why there was a scuba tank chilling in the hot tub this morning?
We found your brother, passed out, floating in our pool, with a bottle, on a blow up mattress. How did he mange to walk 2 blocks and get into our backyard?
your goal of the night was to unlock your iPhone with your nipple. You're going places.
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
Now go wash the fat girl off your hands.
It's surprise blowjob week. You should be excited.
You gotta pick a side. My suggestion: side with tits.
I accidentally called my professor daddy...and I think he liked it. Help, I'm scared.
I fell asleep with a half eating burrito in my hand and woke up to cat vomit with burrito in it.
Doing blow in the bathroom isnt the same without you
Do a rail off the baby station in my honor
You ran outside mistaken the snow for sand and started screaming "WHERES TH BEACH"
Randomize
