We need to find a way to make penises more like hookahs.
Someone sharpied 'shit show' on my tits. Someone with excellent penmanship
My sink just fell out of the wall. I can't deal with this right now
No, he attached a coozie to his crutches so he can carry his beer around the party.
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
Dude, seduce him with cookies. You almost turned me gay with scones. Don't be surprised when they get you laid.
ASS. GYMANSTICS. OLYMPICS. NOW!!!
Don't worry, I'm preparing for tonight by lining my purse with a garbage bag.
I think the paper my teacher just handed back to me had one of his pubes on it, I'm way too hungover for this
Now I can't say for certain but I'm 90 percent are I bathed myself with dog shampoo last night
I woke up the other day with my Google browser open to "DIY lip injections"... I also just received a vial of hyaluronic acid and a package of TB syringes from amazon. I'm down.
I will have no part of this.
I'll pass on that plan. The lack of my penis in new vaginas is no where on the itinerary.
I was sleeping and woke up in the bathroom already puking like i slept walk. Perrrrrrfect.
I'm literally trapped as the little spoon on a mattress on the floor of an unfinished basement with a professional athlete snoring in my hair
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