The worst thing that has ever happened to me happened today. I was taking donations at goodwill and someone donated a clearly used vibrator
Dear man in the lobby please go play whith yourself elsewhere
She begged me for sex again. I felt like I was telling a homeless person I didn't have any change.
i chugged some hot sauce before i gave him head. i think a burning penis is a great way to say fuck you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The kid in the park, who was on a leash I might add, looked at us and yelled "stranger danger" before hiding behind his dad
I think I'm dead. Why did I think it was a good idea to hang from the banister while someone poured liquor into my mouth?
This will be the 3rd time you have blacked out and lost your phone only to have some kind stranger find it, charge it, call me, then mail it back to you. Your luck amazes me...
The girl that works the front desk at my gym invited me and my friend to come see her Tuesday during her shift at hooters because its her birthday. I still have a boner
i don't even know why we got arrested this time. i think the cops just like our company at this point
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do I really need this much space in my mouth?
Are you already high?
dude there's a blind guy on the trail using his service dog to hit on girls.
I wish I could have a tequila IV with me all the time. Intravenous tequila intoxication.
May he have a McRib induced stroke and lose the feeling in his tastebuds.
i definitely signed you up to receive text message notifications from a jukebox last night. Not even sorry.
Dude, Kevin called the cops on the cops.
Randomize
