I just worked out and used handles of vodka as weights. Whoever said alcoholism is detrimental to you health obviously has no fucking idea.
you know, even black out drunk I can always remember the exact point where I should have stopped drinking.
you started putting condoms on anything with a point, then you were yelling at the lamp for using your last condom...
Im not moving so it's going to have to be a 3 some.
I don't see what kind of idea someone could get from an envelope covered in jesus stickers and a note from a person and their dog. I'd say crazy person alert before flirting.
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
Not yoga, whiskey. Totally mis-typed whiskey.
I don't know what's worse. The fact that my biological mother is an unwitting bigamist, or the fact that my half sister is trying to seduce my girlfriend.
The only thing he told me before he passed out was that he is from Buffalo and I'm a bitch.
No idea but I'm preparing for 4 tequila shots and tons of vomit
He kept telling me my vagina was a pleasure cave... I ended up just taking it as a complimetn
it's like he didn't even know what a vagina was
Just because my bed is easier to get to doesn't mean it's okay to fuck in.
Can’t. It’s taco and dick night.
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