Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
A lady just asked me if you "seat yourselves" here at qdoba. I told her yea and she has been sitting at a table waiting for someone to take her order for 25 mins.
We planned for the zombie apocalypse. In great detail. Of course there was booze involved.
i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
You are colorful like whore, yet adorable, like sad puppy. You need more drink.
Oddly enough when I decided to stop whoreing myself out... I lost most of my companionship.
i will be the first lesbian to ever fail women's studies.
Thanks for stopping me from letting that 14 year old feel my boobs. Thanks.
I fingered her though her window because she couldn't leave
I can't talk to her. I know entirely too much about her genitals to hold a conversation without mentioning them.
WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WE'RE WATCHING BIRTHING VIDEOS!!!!
So everything was good he was big spoon I was little spoon and then I got peed on
We compared her boobs to bacon. I'm probably going to have to justify that.
So for St Paddys day I colored my junk green and got a little hat for him....wanna see it before I sober up....
He told me that if he broke my bed my bed durring sex he would take me to ikea, but only on Monday because it's all you can eat meatballs. I think I'm in love.
Randomize