how do we leave politely?
Tell them I'm going into labor. I will spill a beer and tell them m water broke.
i was more sad about losing him as neighbor on fishville than as a boyfriend
i'm sitting in the library realizing that the 2 most productive things i did this weekend was have sex and go to the liquor store...
This Casey James character from American Idol is really gonna mess up my sex life.
Or maybe the fact that you know who Casey James is will be what messes up your sex life.
He literally sends me dick pictures, EVERY DAY. SEVERAL DIFFERENT ANGLES ..it's like I GET THE POINT.
It was the best of bangs; it was the worst of bangs.
While eating post sex burritos I dripped taco bell sauce on my boob. He licked it off and asked why I hadn't thought of that before.
well, I yelled "the tribe has spoken!" at a boatload of people and then I walked home alone in the pouring rain at 1:30am. karma really is a bitch, yo.
Remember, ur body isn't a visitors center
Just recreated a sandwich from the caf in my own kitchen. Graduation denial at it's finest.
If you got me high enough to laugh at a ceiling fan until I shat my pants you should at least have the decency to buy me another pair
We were having a serious discussion about Blue's Clues and I just kept thinking, 'you've seen me naked'.
just woke up on the floor of my shower...it was still runnning
My heart says buy the granny panties, but my vagina says don't throw in the towel yet.
He's smoked my weed, stolen my cigarettes, and used my campus cash, but I try to initiate sex and NOWWW he's all "As your RA, that's a line I can't cross"
Randomize
