Your date looks like the Cloverfield monster. good luck.
You don't need id to drink rum in an alley.
Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
I gave him a blowie and after he said he wanted to send a giftbasket to the girl we met through.
And then she started grabbing onto random guys legs, asking their names, and if they wanted to be friends... Haha, I love when the girls my ex's are dating are total drunken whores.
She left me a voicemail too. It's just her moaning her name repeatedly
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
Sometimes I seriously wonder if I could get away with vodka Sundays at work. Cuz this red bull feels naked.
I pretty much envision me eating a turkey leg whilst fucking you. I have priorities.
I think it was the free bomb shots from the creepy bolivians that sent us over the edge
You decided that walking wasn't in the cards for you anymore
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
Yeah when I texted her last night the only response I got was "stoned eating cobbler."
He said that I started crying after sex because he was leaving to go back to Europe after the semester was over and I wouldn't see his dick anymore. This is why I need to stop hooking up with the exchange students.
My head is bruised from having sex in the backseat of an explorer last night.
Randomize
