it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
You should really come over right now. There's hot construction workers across the street. I'm gonna go pour beer on myself in a bikini on the sidewalk. See you in 5?
there's no such thing as luck on your birthday, only drunken invincibility, make it happen
There are going to be so many Snookis this Halloween that I might just dress as the guy that hit her and punch them all in the face
You were hanging upside down on the subway with your feet in the stirrup handle bars. the children were amused.
Are you absolutely against sleeping in your car? Because i've done that before.
I just feel like I should give it a rest. I'm too old to be drinking bottles of grey goose and falling into koi ponds.
Thanks for letting me in last night. I was drunkenly sleepwalking.
I'll be home next weekend. Its mothers day. Let's party just enough so we are frightened it might be our first
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
Operation: 12 Dick pics of Christmas was a sweeping success, thanks for asking!
I think I fell asleep on the dance floor at one point...but played it off cool and acted like I just did the robot.
I probably shouldn't be taking relationship advice from my side piece...
Its like the floor is slow but life is fast?
I see you found the nyquil...
So she said she could really go for a cheeseburger and I remembered I had one in my pocket. No idea where it came from.
Randomize
