Texts From Last Night

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  (248): View more from Michigan

  Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?

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  (248): Great. Don't do shady things like that ok? http://tfl.nu/xavr
  Replies (4) Good night (1204) Bad night (1252)
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  (319): View more from Iowa

  i just drank a strangers drink off a toilet

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  (319): i just drank a strangers drink off a toilet http://tfl.nu/p6vj
  Replies (12) Good night (738) Bad night (3450)
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  (804): View more from Virginia

  I just woke up in bed with 4 girls. Either i dont remember the best night of my life or they think im gay.

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  (804): I just woke up in bed with 4 girls. Either i dont remember the best night of my life or they think im gay. http://tfl.nu/7iul
  Replies (17) Good night (8250) Bad night (914)
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  (858): View more from California

  So my Christmas cards this year will be my mug shot with my kids face photo shopped next to me....too ghetto?

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  (858): So my Christmas cards this year will be my mug shot with my kids face photo shopped next to me....too ghetto? http://tfl.nu/poyg
  Replies (18) Good night (1583) Bad night (3560)
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  (707): View more from California

  It was like my butthole was peeing. Felt comforting yet not fulfilling.

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  (707): It was like my butthole was peeing. Felt comforting yet not fulfilling. http://tfl.nu/12gk
  Replies (9) Good night (739) Bad night (3825)
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  (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  I'm drinking a margarita out of my 'best bj' trophy and it tastes like victory.

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  (412): I'm drinking a margarita out of my 'best bj' trophy and it tastes like victory. http://tfl.nu/1joi
  Replies (30) Good night (6400) Bad night (1223)
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  (513): View more from Ohio

  So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.

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  (513): So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations. http://tfl.nu/znj0
  Replies (19) Good night (6032) Bad night (1051)
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  (201): View more from New Jersey

  bikini waxes are so much more painful when you know you're not getting laid

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  (201): bikini waxes are so much more painful when you know you're not getting laid http://tfl.nu/hxiy
  Replies (22) Good night (1054) Bad night (4641)
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  (937): View more from Ohio

  also. he gave me a foot massage during 69ing when i got a cramp. he's a winner.

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  (937): also. he gave me a foot massage during 69ing when i got a cramp. he's a winner. http://tfl.nu/f3ww
  Replies (14) Good night (5565) Bad night (829)
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  (201): View more from New Jersey

  I am currently sitting on a candy bar to warm it up cause it was in the fridge so I can eat it while watching the last song and smoking weed by myself

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  (201): I am currently sitting on a candy bar to warm it up cause it was in the fridge so I can eat it while watching the last song and smoking weed by myself http://tfl.nu/d62r
  Replies (34) Good night (2213) Bad night (3763)
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  (970): View more from Colorado

  We are possibly on our way, unless we see the limo full of strippers.

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  (970): We are possibly on our way, unless we see the limo full of strippers. http://tfl.nu/cjb4
  Replies (10) Good night (3994) Bad night (1380)
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  (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  took adderall before wrapping presents, ended up making paper snowflakes for two hours

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  (215): took adderall before wrapping presents, ended up making paper snowflakes for two hours http://tfl.nu/otx8
  Replies (8) Good night (3382) Bad night (796)
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  (519): View more from Ontario

  Woke up naked wearing mismatched earrings. Didn't even make it to the bar.

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  (519): Woke up naked wearing mismatched earrings. Didn't even make it to the bar. http://tfl.nu/0nuz
  Replies (2) Good night (1541) Bad night (1210)
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  (865): View more from Tennessee

  I rammed pretzels and Jell-O shots down the throats of those I loved.

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  (865): I rammed pretzels and Jell-O shots down the throats of those I loved. http://tfl.nu/vcfc
  Replies (1) Good night (562) Bad night (363)
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  (971): View more from Oregon

  I'm high. The text bubbles floating do no justice to the underwater experiences

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  (971): I'm high. The text bubbles floating do no justice to the underwater experiences http://tfl.nu/bg58
  Replies (0) Good night (300) Bad night (161)

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