This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
I am no longer a man. I just realized I prefer Spongebob to college football.
that girl looks like she smells like hot dog water...
Whatever. I'm saving myself for my wedding night or a night with enough patron.
Too long to explain. Basically I started an electircal fire. No one was hurt except for a box of cereal near the outlet.
At least we kept it together. It's people like him who yell at bushes that give acid a bad name
just used my sex toy cleaning solution to clean my reading glasses. midterms are cramping my styleeee
I feel like when purchasing hard liquor on a Monday I also need to buy a happy 21st bday card to not seem so pathetic
I just realized that in 3 weeks it becomes sad if I make everything into a drinking game. Fuck growing up
I said, hypothetically speaking, if I was going to be having some rough sex Friday night, when WOULD be the best time for a massage, mother dear?
I'm in the liquor store and fucking "Wannabe" by the Spice Girls is playing. IM ALREADY ASHAMED OF MY REASON FOR BEING HERE, GIVE ME A BREAK.
Sorry I missed your call earlier. I was getting high with my high school band teacher.
Why is my belly button ring in my ear
We just started our own DARE program: Drugs are really enjoyable.
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