Desperate + desperate does not equal a fun night.
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
i just opened a seperate checking account to keep track of how much i make and spend on our keggers
He grabbed onto my boobs while slipping on ice then proceeded to drag me down with him I'm not predicting head in his future
So squirting runs in the family.
He started doing the gator chop at my vag and said he couldn't wait to "chomp" on it later...and I still slept with him. I hate gainesville.
Irrelevant. Does he have queso? That's the real question.
Just got 20% off at the liquor store. How you ask? I asked if there was an "I got divorced today" discount.
There was an unopened condom by my car when I went to pick it up this morning. Someone may have fucked on the hood of my car last night. Don't think it was me but I can't rule it out 100%.
He's getting me an energy drink and said good morning beautiful. He must sense i'm cutting him off from the sex.
Its like I've been given a sexual blank check.
It's pretty telling that my resolutions all involve who I will sleep with in 2014.
It's important to play to your strengths.
Is it bad I have to get shitty ass drunk on a Monday night because I can't adult?
Also I’m on 3%. Just Incase.. I miss you and I love you and you’re my everything and I’m getting drunk.
Bring vodka when you get back from court.
Randomize
