Situation: He got it in my eye, how long do I let it sting before should start to worry?
it must be christmas time, i've got a hankering to give a virgin a baby....
every facebook tagged picture of yours, you are either drinking, swimming or drunk in water
And drunk me decided to play keep away with sober me's dignity
That girl definitely just ate a hot dog and stared straight in to my eyes.
I can already tell, the amount of fun I'm having right now is not nearly going to compensate for the amount of "let us never speak of this again" I'm gonna have tomorrow
I pulled you and a keg around in a wagon for like five hours and apparently everyone else remembers it but us.
It was crazy man, at one point after already going 3 rounds I tried to breakaway for a smoke...she yanked me by the nipple hair back on top of her.
She made me pour olive oil on her.
Dick very happy bro
chicken nuggets make me a bit homicidal
I never thought I would encounter a situation that was "Too Gay" for me...and yet there I was.
Is someone on their way here yet? I'm way too tweaked to be here alone
He has me blocked on facebook.... so I stalked him using my cats fan page.
you have 30 seconds to convince me not to grab this guy's crotch in front of his girlfriend
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