Also, I'm sitting at a crosswalk watching two Mexican gangs fight each other. I miss you too. A lot.
hey, we don't wanna leave the house because we're watching fireworks on tv. this is america.
you sent me 45 texts saying "meow?"
did i?
I have a fruit stripe tattoo on my penis. You're the only person I know who chews that gum.
Drunk and had dance off with 8 year old. Lost. Still drinking
I need Christmas break to be over. I'm tired of fucking my old High School girlfriends
You said "i miss him" not "i miss his dick." You're getting emotionally attatched. Shame.
I really shouldn't have to apologize. It was your own damn fault for opening a tab at the bar and telling me about it.
I will not fill you in on the details until we get back, so do not ask. I got peed on by the girl I was hooking up with last night.
I FOUND AN AUSTRALIAN THEY CALL VOMMING 'RAINBOW SNEEZING' I'M NEVER LETTING HIM LEAVE EVER
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
He thought my hair would soak it up. I HAD TO CUT IT OFF.
It's like he drunk calls 6 times for me to come over, but can't say hello at lunch.
I forgot to lock the bathroom door. He walked in, saw me on the toliet, nodded, and walked back out.
Nothing says depression like laying in your bed stoned, naked, and eating a cupcake
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