oh so you have enough money for the third eye blind concert but not enough for the morning after pill?
I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
i had a dream last night that my liver tore its self out of my body and ran away.
The best part was her genuine shock and total "I didn't know" look when we said she couldn't cook a steak in a microwave.
I know you hold the fastest time for "zoo downhill wheelchair racing" but I don't see what that has to do with this.
Math equation of the day: 4 waffles + 1 bowl of weed = 1 terrific nap
I wish I was a power ranger. Also the universe is immense. Like it never ends. Never.
They are taking turns pissing on the fire. This is my life.
My boobs are feeling quite sensitive so I told them, " you is smart, you is kind, you is important" that should do the trick.
LOVE ME MORE THAN PIZZA CAN
Ok. You have started something that can only end with a picture of the inside of my butthole. It may happen today or next year, but it's on my agenda.
Btw I'm playing passed out so you can get laid but obviously you need to take the offense just ask him if he wants to go to bed and leave a cigg on the counter
I was told I was gorgeous and a whore by the drag queens. My night is complete.
i woke up with a shamrock tattoo on my wrist and a fat bruise on my hipbone. please tell me its not real.
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
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