this year's halloween challenge: make audrey hepburn go from classy to slutty drunk
No, I think it was the night I threw up in her front yard. You're thinking of the time I threw up in her backyard.
After arriving 30 minutes late, he slowly walked to his desk and halfway there he just falls over like a tree and passes out. I now have some sort of proof as to how awesome that night was.
Ran into him again last night, stole his glowstick and walked away. The glowstick mountain in my room keeps growing.
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
I told him he was like my favorite pair of jeans; I may not wear them every day, but I'll never get rid of them and they make my ass look fantastic. Needless to say he was not thrilled.
Right when he asked me if I was on birth control my dad walked in. This is my fate.
He compared my blow job skills to finding gold treasure in a gold chest, so there's that.
I showed him my machete and then we made out in the kitchen
You should frame my arrest warrant.
I emptied a Vyvance capsule into my coffee pot last night and set the auto start. Pretty sure I've been drinking meth all morning
Yeah last night got weird fast. No lie, a kid pulled a butt-plug with a tail out of his ass.
Jus pulled over and stole. Corn out of a. Field. ... get on my level
Listen all I know is that mistakes were made and she stole the car and drove half an hour for food at 4 am
I didn't know it was possible and I don't know if I'll ever be able to do it again on my own but he literally fuck me sideways.
Randomize
