Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
those bitches were sniggering at my man-pris like they were goddesses of fashion!
...dude i pray you are quoting something, someone, anyone...
so this guy comes in from the patio covered in puke and says "we gotta go"...Yup u need to go is an understatement
smoking a cig and getting head on the last night of my cruise. and she doesn't mind that i'm texting you right now. this is now on my list of top 10 nights of my life.
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
i'm sitting in class and looking at who would die if all the fans suddenly fell from the ceiling. i guess i have next year to pass history..
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
I got whiskey, so I think the blizzard and I are at an even match
1) I'm a decent drunk texter. 2) My world is spinning. 3) I'll give you a dollar and a hug for a glass of water. 4) I love you. 5) Example: your penatrive ways are overwhelming my alternative lyfestyle. 6) That is all.
7) Noodle arms: engage
The example was me just using big words while hammered. You're welcome. Ambidextrious. I spelled it right.
So wait. Let me get this straight lol... you... are are considering offering fetish services to "trample and own" someone for $80 in order to pay for someone to come organize ur shit? Pure genius.
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
I saw a shooting star while he was eating me out at 3am by my neighbors pool. Doesn't get more magical than that
Our DD painted my costume on me for tonight. The strippers have been teaching him how to paint costumes.
Me: 10% human, 90% poor drunken life choices.
I have a burn on my hand, I'm covered in bruises, I think my toe is broken, and I have no clothes to wear home.
Randomize
