So My parents cut me off after I started making blood marys with hienz ketchup
I just drove by a church. On the sign out front was written 'crocodile cock'. On both sides.
Is it sad that when she told me he has a small peen I felt like it made us more compatible?
I decided that $2 and a kiss on the cheek was a great tip for the pizza girl. No one is REALLY sure how much I've have to drink.
I just had a vision of confetti exploding out of someone's vagina to the sound of air horns... I think that would be welcoming.
I like the way you think.
I'm okay. We got a prayer rug sent to us with the face of jesus on it. From Tulsa Oklahoma. Kinda weird.
in the middle of getting head my cat meowed. she looked up , meowed back, and then continued giving me head.
Just made a memo in my blackberry that contains seth's funeral arrangements. I have a feeling he has big plans for the weekend.
Pre-chapter meeting quote: "Why is there a bun literally taped to the shelf? That doesn't even make sense when you're drunk, who does that?"
Let's have sex in an apple orchard
I'm going to start using the hurricane naming system for my hangovers. Hangover Agatha is a real bitch today.
McDonald's and a car nap. I feel kinda human
i found you laying on the floor staring at the ceiling and you kept muttering "why" in various inflections.
God bless the petty bitch who invented screen shot
Im bringing my light up rubber ducky just in case we end up at a rave tonight. HE CHANGES COLOR!
Randomize
