even my worst enemy doesn't deserve a bush like that
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
We went to red robin and there was a 15 minute wait so we went and fucked in the car. Quickies, endless fries, and a mascot handing out balloons- this is literally the night of my dreams.
and apparently i was drunk enough to follow up with "I'd let me touch your boobs" ... not my best line.
i can barely afford taco bell don't think a baby is in the budget
I spit up blood this morning
That's vegas.
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
could you please explain to me why my jumper cables are on my bedroom floor?
I think the pivotal moment was when we used the see and say as a drinking game with shots of whiskey. It was all downhill after that.
He equated my biology degree to a belief in Santa. I wonder if he heard the doors to my vagina clanging shut.
The number of males in the usa getting circumsized are decreasing. Keep this in mind when we become cougars
Well my dad thinks I wake up at 3 or 4 am every day. Really it is just all the booty calls, but I'm glad he thinks I am so motivated
No it was good. I serenaded the holding cell occupants with a fabulous rendition of Making Love out of Nothing at all. It was fucking amazing!
I've been called an asshole for a lot of things in my life, but I never thought it would be because of potatoes
ps why does my dog smell like popcorn and a dryer sheet..?
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