Got bored today and made list of places in apt I want to have sex. One includes opening and coming out the window.
If I die, please delete the word file entitled "Rainy Day"
if you google earth my address you can see me getting out of my car. finally my moment of being famous
and if it starts getting weird im just going to tell him i used to be a man
He sent me a Microsoft outlook meeting request to blow him in the storage room at work. I had to accept.
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
Ugh contemplating vodka and chocolate protein powder as this Capri sun and vodka isn't really cutting it
Im part way to drunk.
I'm pretty sure I just smoked a chunk of cat food. Thought it was something else. No reply needed.
Damn it. Can't order pizza. Can't do the hot tub. No one to invite over for loud, kinky sex. What's the point of being here alone?!
He's going to wonder why I have burn marks on my asshole
See and now you're talking. I am like the fairy godmother of hook ups.
I think I may have just hit a new slutty low! ..... Just purchased the Costco pack of condoms... $9.99/48 pack = amazing deal! The judgement when I bust out the value pack = priceless!!!
You some how ended up sleeping on one of the beams that run along the ceiling of your house
When he busted out the ketchup I got the hell out of there. It got really creepy really fast.
He woke me with blue berry pancakes and a blow job. He's a keeper.
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