Just donated money to a kid for her softball team.
Obviously I'm trying to futher our next generation of lesbians. I may be hitting on her at the gay bar in ten years...
its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
This is worse that I thought. He's playing violin for me.
Ignoring the crisis im in. Sitting in the front yard in a kiddie pool. Wearing arm floaties, fins and a snorkel. Waiting for a hot guy to walk by.
He made me eat donuts off his dick. donuts, jen. DONUTS.
dude this night sums up my single life. naked, crying, and covered in honey. i need to get laid.
Remind me in the morning that I've now seen a guy do crack. That actually happened. I'm at the wrong party.
Officially crunch time. It's my last year of grad school and I've yet to get blown in a school library. The parking garage was less than a block away though.
I decided to start over my porn collection by deleting the old stuff. That was a sad piece of a pie chart...
He kept asking for nudes so I sent him a picture another guys dick. He called me ruthless.
I'm smoking in a kimono on the couch. Bring me gin.
Do I go to spinning class and try to redeem myself from going drunk, or do I wait a week and hope they forget I fell of the bike?
I think it was a low point but honestly at this point I've had so many that my life is like a valley
I may be a complete scumbag but even im not willing to spend a grand and sit on a plane for 24 hours just for shrooms and a blowjob
He was someone so memorable that I'd completely forgotten he'd existed up to and during the encounter
Randomize
