i feel like when youre not in my profile picture no one knows who i am.
i think its awesome that according to your mom i'm your friend that caught on fire.
in fingerprint form on my ass. Seriously not cool. \ni bruiiiseeee like a delicate fruiiiitttt. Heeeaaarrr the rythymmm
i just thought that perhaps i was done with the "boning on someone else's futon" stage of my life. guess not.
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I'm so sick
I would imagine. You did most of your drinking for brazil last night.
That and I think I got food poisoning from sharing nachos with that homeless guy..
WHY DIDN'T YOU INVITE ME TO RUN THROUGH TACO BELL'S SPRINKLERS AT 4AM?!
How many people slept in the bouncy castle last night?
4 guys, 1 girl. Pretty sure were gonna have to pay the cleaning fee
Fuck I am so excited for the first time I can make someone call me Doctor Nikki during sex after I finish my PhD
I had to write an apology letter to my roomate for hotboxing in our bathroom. What a bitch.
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Last night someone asked you what your favorite color was and you said "bagel."
I smell like thanksgiving dinner and bad decisions. Its not even thanksgiving yet.
Just bumped into my ex. Blowing a dude in the ladies' room at Disney World. I guess it really was her not me.
Okay. So did I kiss you last night? I know that I made out with someone. Or a few someones. But I'm pretty sure that I made out with you. Was that real life?
Date with Air Force guy was nice btw. And for my next trick I'll talk him into fucking me in his fighter jet at 30,000 ft.
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
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